What I Don't Know ...

Cheeves. 

What a week already. Two-plus hours spent with the contractor mapping out the Waltenburg Ranch Revision c.2023. My head is a bit spinny. Other things of a more personal nature that I won't talk about here - all of it just piling on. 

Meanwhile, it's been a good week so far with regards to dietary decisions. Two days sans junk of the sugar and carb nature. Not 1000% sugar free, but much healthier versions, by way of peaches, and berries. Ended up, purely by accident, fasting for 21-ish hours. While I eat significantly less than a younger me would, I still know that fasting is just not my "jam" as the kids say, and as I hope to never say again. I like to chew. 

As of this morning, down four pounds since Monday morning. It's the same four I gain and lose every time I do stupid shit, so it's fairly meaningless. 

Today, Nettie is getting her spa treatment and a checkup because she's been having gastro issues of her own. She killed her first animal the other night - a baby possum. It was vile. I won't share the gory details (all TOO gory), but just eww. 

How this face could do so much damage to assorted beings is beyond me ... 

I am excited to report that I completely hooked up a KVM switch to the PC and new laptop so that now, I can operate both from one mouse and keyboard, and use the main monitor for both. I should have probably got one that supported speaker switching, as well, but I did not. Life goes on. I will say that the desk is a bit cramped now, and it's NOT a tiny desk, but it will do until we begin life in AZ. THEN, I will be achieving a monstrous L-shaped thing, or a long table where I can just roll back and forth. 

Only one thing left to learn/tackle: the graphics tablet. This will DEFINTELY cramp the desk real estate, but it's the thing I'm looking forward to working with the most. 

I did order another mousepad (and can't remember if I mentioned that) and a new shirt (mine will be long-sleeved, but also black). So I, alone, am keeping my Zazzle Rad*Ish Pads and Rad*Ish Studios stores in business. At least I won't run out of shirts I want to wear :) 

Don't ask stupid questions, just go get one

I am obsessed, and I don't particularly know why

So, in summary: 

What I don't know: 

*When we will actually get started on the renovations

*When we will get to move 

What I do know: 

*It's all good 

*Everything will work out the way it's meant to work out 

*I feel so much better when I don't eat shit foods 

*I am in charge of my responses and reactions to life 

*I love making art

*I love being able to make art on computers and online 

Also, something I probably should relay: 

I don't talk about other people or things that happen because I've done that in the past, and I don't feel good about it. I'm over it. This here is my space to talk about things that directly relate to me because, in the real world, very, very few people ever ask about me. Not a pity party, just the way it is. I could be a CEO of the world's largest corporation with the biggest salary ever, and my family would assume that I just sit at home on the couch eating bon-bons and watching soaps. Anytime we see them in person, or talk to them on the phone, they don't ask about me. They ask about my beloved and how his job is going, the same job he has had for the past many years, and the same career he's had for at least the past 20. Me? Crickets. 

They know nothing about what I do. They don't know anything about my job. They didn't know I had my own business until two-plus years ago when my beloved spoke up and said something at Christmas dinner. Then, they went back to asking about his job. See? No interest. So, yes, it may have been a slight feeling of justification/comfort to hear my brother tell me he understood why I don't live around them. 

Also, I've just realized that it's pointless to talk about much of anything. All it does is upset ME, and it won't change things to talk about anything, so it's best to just shut up and DO stuff and let the chips fall wherever they land. 

When I'm gone, I am GONE, and nothing I have done will matter any more, then, to those who couldn't take the time to pay attention, but it will have meant something to me, and that's what matters. We have to do the things that bring US, ourselves, joy. This life really is too short to worry about all the bullshit. 

This is has been my vent/rant/tangent/off-in-the-weeds moment. 

Time to get to work. I have shit to do! 

Have a wonderful day! x